Diamondback Online - The University of Maryland's Independent Daily Student Newspaper

Issue date: 2/29/08 Section: News

Rubbers, bodily fluids and dirty one-liners.

A kinky one-night stand? Try stand-up comedy.

Twenty student performers tried their comedy skills in Stamp Student Union's Atrium last night before a crowd of 100 and a panel of judges, including Latino Student Union leaders and Student Entertainment Events directors. Each hoped for a shot at the grand prize: A chance to open for comedian Pablo Francisco on the campus March 10th.

To be sure, they were amateurs. But freshman communication major Meghan Courtney was pleasantly surprised.

"To be honest, I was expecting a lot of people who thought they were funny, because a lot of people laugh at their jokes at parties," she said.

The uncontested winner of the night was freshman business major Chris DeCaro, whose stage presence, unabashed personality and obvious preparation stood out. "I recently got a girlfriend," he started. They recently took their relationship to "the next level," he continued, narrating his trip to the Commons Shop where he picked out box of condoms, envisioning his "dong of justice."

SEE Comedy Director Jessie Thompson said she was happy with the winner and the turnout. The judges "all agreed upon the winner," she said.

Thompson has been planning the show since homecoming weekend. Because so many students turned out for the group's open mic night last semester, she had high hopes for last night's program.

"There are so many comedy groups on campus, I just wanted to give them a chance to perform as individuals," she said.

The dimmed lights and plastic bowls of Chex Mix gave the room the feel of a comedy club. The crowd's attention wavered throughout the night. But for the comedians, the rare side-splitter elicited a roar that was well worth the wait.

Freshman journalism major Justin Cousson, who described his comedy as "offbeat, quirky, angry, joyous," said he planned to "get something for everyone in the room." How did he plan on doing that? "With staggering accuracy."

Sophomore computer science major Atif Myers, who is of Moroccan descent, said of his comedic experience, "I've bombed once. Well, I'm Arab, so it's what I do." He added, "When you're a comedian, you can tell a girl the truth, and she'll just think you're joking."

Nick Ruggia told his audience what he says to his friends who ask him if he has a dog. His reply? "No, but I do have a f--- buddy with a tail," he deadpanned.

Senior studio art major Todd Mathers praised the "white guy" he saw working at his local Chipotle. He was like the "Jackie Robinson of the food industry," he remarked.

Continued...

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