Home life: How to delay the inevitable

There is nothing I wanted to do less than walk across the stage and graduate that fateful day in May. I was never one of those people who was ready to pack up all my things and leave College Park. Rather, I recognized its value for the simple perks.

Sure, I felt tuition was a bit too high, and I didn't agree with all the administrative decisions that were made or how the university was run. But at the same time, when I left college, I knew I was going to mourn those sweet, succulent days of youth. The biggest reason being the people I befriended along the way.

Nothing feels better than knowing the weekend is right around the corner and you and your friends have all the time and power to do whatever sort of lascivious activities you can think of with it. I mean, if it's not a house party, then there's still Route 1. If not College Park, U Street was always a good second option. Being out of your parents' home afforded you the freedom to party like you wanted to over the weekend. No one, save for a resident assistant, was going to stop you from covering the entire floor of your apartment with sand for a tropical-themed keg party.

So, where does that leave the kids who move home for summer break or us jobless post-graduates in the same state? We have to hide our revelry and party in parent-safe ways.

Here are some alternative party methods for College Park when you have to move back home.

Option 1 (My plan for tonight): Drunk Youtube and Chatroulette party. This party requires very little preparation and requires only a computer with Internet, a web cam, at least one friend and alcohol to drink. It's pretty simple — just drink, be offended by voyeurists and laugh at videos like the one of a girl dancing to Beyonce while wearing a clown mask.

Option 2: Figure out who out of your friends has the "hippest" parents who are "down" with it. They're likely to be the types to bring weed up in conversations with a knowing look and a cavalier, "Yeah, I used to roll a doobie or two" attitude. Get all the friends over to their house and under the guise of wanting to know all about their college days, pass them a few Natural Lights and challenge them to a game of beer pong.

Option 3: The always-wholesome barbecue. Pack a cooler and some friends and head down to the nearest backyard, state park or beach, and just let loose for some daylight debauchery — just don't assault the wildlife.

Option 4: Check out the local townie bars. I mean, not everybody went away for college, right? Maybe you'll see some old high-school friends — like the kid who ate the frog lung during biology lab — hidden among the old truckers at Flo's. Wouldn't that be fun?

Option 5: Who are you kidding? Stop lying to yourself, and be that creepy graduate who still hangs around College Park trying to live out your glory days. Let's go, class of 2011!

Shruti Rastogi graduated in May with a degree in journalism. She can be reached at rastogi at umdbk dot com.