Relationships: Hooking a hook-up

I recently read an article on Jezebel.com by Katy Kelleher called, "What's the Dumbest Thing You've Done to Get Laid?" It's about how women also do stupid things to get the person they're interested in.

My guy friends and I have been debating this for years. They claim all a girl has to do to get a guy is look at him, preferably while naked. I disagreed and decided to conduct my own investigation. But what began as playful girl talk quickly turned into something more serious.

I started out by asking by asking, "What is the craziest thing you've ever done to get someone?"

Some of the responses were predictable: Walking out of your way to oh-so-casually bump into them as they get out of class, pretending to like whatever their T-shirt said and, of course, asking a cute stranger for the time or directions when you need neither.

The best response was from a friend who confessed to joining gospel choir for an entire semester to flirt with a crush she ultimately did not win. For the record: She is not Christian and had no Christian upbringing.

"It was a pretty big decision because it was between LOST and gospel choir, but I joined it just so I could guarantee seeing him once a week," she said. "He ended up moving to Japan, lived in Iowa after graduation to do some sort of AmeriCorps thing and is in a relationship with a girl who is much less hot than him, which makes me happy."

Well, at least she's not bitter.

Other amusing stories came from girls who wanted to continue the relationships they were already in.

"This one guy only liked hooking up when there was a horror movie on in the background. He was really ‘talented,' so I just let that go," one girl said. However, she drew the line at Saw and did not enjoy this practice at all. "For me, hearing people dying violently whilst hooking up is slightly awkward," she explained.

Another girl deals with text rejection from her current boy. She's been leaving messages such as, "Hypothetical situation. If I wanted to ‘meet up' between the U.S. vs. Slovenia and England vs. Algeria [matches], would you be available?" He elegantly responded to that one, "No."

Then a friend turned the conversation more serious. "You should discuss the ways that girls will keep a guy happy without realizing that they are compromising their own happiness," she suggested.

One girl shared how she allowed her boyfriend to shut her off from all her friends because he felt their relationship should be more than enough. Another girl just ended a verbally abusive relationship in which the guy would constantly make remarks about her weight and intelligence. She only left him when the relationship took a violent turn. Another friend didn't want to discuss her past relationships but said she was grateful for the University Health Center's Sexual Assault Response and Prevention Program because it was able to help her in her time of need.

Despite everything, an astounding number of my friends actually said they approach first when they see people they are attracted to. From chasing boys on playgrounds to chatting them up in bars during World Cup matches, these women are fierce.

My friend has a three-step strategy. First, she'll compliment them to make her interest known. Then, she'll casually tell them she likes them by saying something along the lines of, "I would like someone like you" when talking about dating. Finally, she'll spend time with them to learn their personality and interests.

So whatever your style, just know the opposite or same sex is working equally hard to get to know you.

Shruti Rastogi graduated in May with a degree in journalism. She can be reached at rastogi at umdbk dot com.